My sympathies MiniMage.
It is truly never easy, I myself have been through roughly 9 funerals of relatives in my life and I'm only 34.
All of them were extremely saddening to me. But then my mom passed away 2 years ago and that made me realize, I needed to celebrate her life and not mourn her death.
Granted I took some time to mourn but it wasn't all I did....I felt bad for as long as I needed and then just thought of every good time we had in the past.
It does make the hurt easier to get through, sure it is still there, but the happy times will always make you feel better.
Plus, it always keeps them in your thoughts which in my opinion is never a bad thing.
Best wishes