Here's my entry
After the Alien Zombies From Outer Space came to Earth, future scientist and antique collector Mang Dagul discovered that the only way to resist the docile-ray (which the A.Z.F.O.S. used on humans to ensure non-resistance while being eaten) was to use an old soup kettle as a helmet.
After being bitten in the pinky by a zombie raccoon, Mang Dagul quickly cut off his left hand to avoid becoming a zombie. Stumbling on an old abandoned laboratory, he used an experimental appendage-growing machine to try and regrow his hand but much to his amazement, four new arms grew instead. Inexplicably, the arms were all of different colors. Sensing an opportunity to fight the A.Z.F.O.S., he quickly implanted a scythe, a sonic blaster, a plasma cannon and a cyborg arm on his new extremities (He did not implant anything on his original right arm as he wanted to be still able to scratch his nose).
Unfortunately, he was not able to walk because of the sheer weight of his implants.
Fortunately, he eventually developed thunder thighs and was able to walk around again.
After several near fatal zombie encounters, he now roams the Earth while wearing his favorite blue tank-top and wristband, looking for other survivors and teaching them the most effective way to kill Alien Zombies From Outer Spaceā¦
a bonk on the beanie with a baseball bat.